Gathering My Sanities Back.

The beginning of the year is always the hardest...most trying. The kids that I labored over day and night, building character and wisdom and confidence into their young little souls...well, now they belong to a new teacher. I get a quick hug in the hallways or a holler from across the schoolyard, and that makes me smile. I'm proud of them, I'm happy to see them being successful in middle school, I'm---

Brought back to reality. My darlings are gone, and standing before me is a fresh, new, wild class of 33 undeveloped young children who only want to cause me pain and suffering. Haha, teasing. That is a hyperbole, as I would tell them. They do not ONLY want to cause me pain and suffering, but in some moments, they do cause me to question my sanity. This group of kiddos feels more energetic, less responsible, and WILD... little did I know I was foreshadowing my first days of school when I decorated my welcome back board with animal cut-outs and the phrase, "Welcome to the Wild World of 5th Grade!" They are like uncaged animals set loose from the zoo! Oops, this isn't meant to be a rant. But teachers, you know you can sympathize with me. The beginning of the year... sigh. 

So, here are some August quotes from my new babies:

 QUOTE 1: During our reading lesson on how to categorize:

Me: (excited about my interactive smartboard activity): 

 "Today we are learning a reading skill called categorizing! I bet you are great at it! Take a look at these fruits & vegetables! For example, look at this pepper, would you categorize it as a fruit or veggie? Come on up and move it to the category you feel is best suited based on its characteristics."

Johnny: 

Raises his hand immediately.

Me: (thinking, yes! Johnny is normally sitting with his head down, sporting an 'I hate school' face of misery. I have a moment of pride that perhaps the worst is over. This is great progress!):  

"Yes, Johnny! What do you think?" 

Johnny: 

"Are you BLIND? Hello??? That's called a pea pod. Not a pepper." 

QUOTE 2: During a math lesson on multiplying two-digit numbers by two-digits: 

Me:

"Just line up your numbers on the right side. Now, let's multiply! Step one--" (I happen to turn from the board just at the right moment to witness--)

George:

"Shuffle,shuffle, shuffle... SLAM!" I see a blur of George jump from his seat, and book it out the classroom door.

Me: (Chasing student out the door) 

"GEORGE wait! Where are you going????"

George: (Holding his stomach in an attempt to appear ill.)

"When you teach math, I feel really, really sick."

*Please note George's theatrical escapee abilities are multifaceted based on the day's needs, and have included:

"When you teach math, I have to go pee really, really bad." 

"When you teach math, I really, really need to read my library book."

"When you teach math, I feel really, really sleepy."

"When you teach math, I really, really need to go to the nurse and get a cough drop, cough, cough, ehhh ehh ehh. Owwww, my throat. Seeeee?"  

[Check here for daily updates on excuses you can use to run out of any room at any time.]

__________________

QUOTE 3:

We have been on "heat advisory" here in AZ for a week straight. Students have no recess. Teachers have no sanity, nor a chance to eat, go to the bathroom, or breathe without 33 students tagging along. We drop the students off to lunch, and then race back to our rooms to sit for 5 minutes, until we hear the pitter patter-- haha! Wrong words-- thunderous stampeding of students racing to get back into class from the cafeteria to have "recess" in the classroom. So, that brings me to quote #3:

Students' echoes come bouncing down the halls: 

"YEAHHHH! INSIDE RECESSSSSS!"

Me: (Cringe)

 I quickly take my first (and knowingly last) bite of lunch. 

Students pop up at the door:

"HI MRS. LLLLLLLLLLLLLL! CAN WE COME IN?!?!?!"

Me (teasingly):

"Please give me one minute to gather my sanity back."

Emily (seriously):

"Oh of course Mrs. L."

Emily shoves the sweat stained, panting students out of the doorway like a pro and closes the door gently, seemingly sweeping all of the chaos out with her. Through the door's window I watch one extra tenacious boy squirm his way back, press his face to the glass, and stick his tongue out at me while making pig faces obnoxiously. I stare him down, chewing my single bite slowly and deliberately. Suddenly, to my private amusement, I see sweet Emily appear in the window just long enough to pummel the boy, clearly knocking him from the door, and then I hear her whisper authoritatively to the class:

"Shh. Shh. Mrs. L needs one minute to gather her sanities back. Line up quietly and make her proud." 

Smiling, I sit there for a minute, admiring the fact that I can sit in the silence of my room and just breathe for a moment, when a well meaning teacher walks by, and I hear:

"Students get out of the hallway! Where is your teacher? Why aren't you in class?"

Students:

"Oh, we can't go in there. Mrs. L is gathering her sanities back."

__________________

James Howell says, "We learn by teaching." 

I am learning not to take my teaching ambitions so seriously all the time. In those exhaustive moments when all seems lost, let a little smile spread across your face, and leave the troubles in the hallway. Take a moment to gather your sanities back.